The first thirty days of a new mom’s life with her newborn is the most crucial. This is the time where, like any other relationships, you experience the “getting to know each other” stage. Here you feel like you are groping, looking for something to grab and rely on. This is the time where you feel you are most tired, most exhausted, and most drained.
The key to a successful first thirty days of your and your newborn’s life is to face the situation prepared. That is why it helps if your read, watch videos, talk to other mothers, anything that will help you learn and gain knowledge on motherhood and related topics.
This article will provide you with the basics of motherhood. This is for first time mothers.
ON NURSING
Babies are always hungry. They need nursing every now and then. Since breastfeeding is the best way to nurse your baby, it often leaves a mother drained from nursing too often. It may result to sore nipples, and tough latch-ons.
It is always a good move to ask for help. It will not be a sign or weakness to admit that you need help. Talk to friends, family, and other people who have had experiences on motherhood and nursing. They will be able to give you advice on how to deal with your problems. Talking to a pediatrician or a lactation expert will also help.
If you are in the hospital, you can ask the help of nurses every time you are ready to feed your baby. They can spot you and give advices.
Babies demand attention. It is a natural reaction for mothers to rush whenever they cry. It is advisable though that you take care of yourself first. Make sure that you are comfortable when you feed your baby as feeding may take some time. If you need to go to the bathroom first before feeding your baby, do so.
Applying warm compress on your breast helps. Heat helps the milk flow properly. Warm compress is advised for engorged or blocked ducts. Introducing your baby to the bottle is to be done at least 3 months (or 6-8 weeks) from birth.
ON SLEEPING
Babies sleep a lot. If they are not feeding, they are sleeping. Babies sleep a total of at least 16 hours every day. They sleep at short intervals, making every mother feel tired and drained. Since you are constantly alert, it makes you exhausted.
The only thing you can do when this happens is sleep when your baby sleeps. This will, at least, minimize your feeling of being deprived of sleep. Take a nap when your baby naps and sleep early.
You and your partner can take turns in rocking the baby when he or she wakes up at night. Tonight is your turn, the next night, your partner’s turn. This will at least give you a full night’s sleep even for just two or three nights per week.
If your baby has trouble sleeping, do whatever it takes to put him to sleep. Rock your baby to sleep, nurse him, make him comfortable, if you need to let your baby sleep on your chest while holding him, do so. If this is what it takes to put your baby to sleep, so be it. And you can rest also if this is the case.
ON INVOLVING YOUR PARTNER
Getting your partner involved in your activities with your baby will make your partner feel like he is really part of your family. The coming of your baby will make your partner feel neglected and probably put of place. This is possible because your time will be spent on caring for your baby most of the time.
Let your partner have the chance to look after the baby himself. Do not criticize him if he makes mistakes. Especially for first time dads, they are hesitant because they might do something wrong.
Giving his own “schedule” to play nanny to your baby. This will give you time to rest and energize. And at the same time give father and baby time to bond and get to know each other. Let them play and have some “fun Time” by themselves while you rest.
ON SOOTHING YOUR BABY
Babies do a lot of stuff when they are restless. They make sounds, gestures, and cry. They do this if they do not get what they want, or hungry, or uncomfortable, or not feeling well. What you must do is to soothe them.
There are several ways to soothe your baby. The mere sound of your voice can soothe them if you talk to them and speak with a calm, soft voice. Rocking your baby is one way to soothe him. Play tunes which are nice to listen to. If it is effective in calming adults, it can be effective on babies to. Especially if you rock them while listening to the tunes being played.
There are times when probably they just feel hot and uncomfortable. That is why they complain. A warm bath is the solution to that. You can use a warm bath, too. It will relax you. A relaxed mom can also relax her baby.
Try to experiment on other activities. Find out which of them can calm your baby.
ON SANITY
Being a mother is a fulfilling “job”. But with the demand which comes with caring for your baby, you will feel drained and exhausted. Do not let this affect you or you will lose your sanity. To stay sane, there are a few things which you need to consider.
Accept whatever help other people may offer you. Be it them volunteering to do housework, etcetera. All kinds of help should be welcomed. This is not a time for pride and ego tripping.
Do not listen to confusing and complicated advices. You are the parent. Final decision must come from you. Find time to go out on your own even for just a few minutes. Chat with your neighbors or just go for short walks. But do not go too far and make sure somebody is with your baby when you go out.
